KING ME: a book review

King Me: What every son wants and needs from his father, was written by Steve Farrar, in 2005.

I have had it on my shelf for a few years now, and read a few pages of it a year or so ago. Recently, God has been really dealing with my heart, as it relates to the discipleship of my children. I am always thinking of how to help others, as a pastor, grow in their relationship with Jesus; but I sometime forget that my number one responsibility is to help my children take their next steps in Christ. So, one of the ways I am focusing on that is by reading some books that can be of help to me in this area. This book focuses on fathers and sons. Even if you have daughters, only, the focus on becoming a better father is well worth the effort to read it.

I would wholeheartedly recommend this book to any father, especially fathers with sons. The best way I know how to share what I learned from a book is to share some of my favorite quotes. Overall, this was a very easy to read book (for those of you men who don't like to read); and it helped refocus me on what is really important, for me as a father, beginning with my relationship to God. I hope these quotes will give you the motivation to find this book, and give it a chance:

• That's what fathering is all about. It's mentoring and equipping your son to become a man who will assume the family leadership for the next generation



• The Bible clearly teaches that God knows everything. He didn't just know it; He ordained it. He knew that you would have a son, and that you would need to mentor that son.



• In the mercy of God, He gives broken men the opportunity to write new chapters in their lives



• Every on wants to be disciplined. he needs it. He may not let on at first, but the happiest son on earth is the son who has been appropriately disciplined. Biblical discipline actually relieves a son. It lets him know that his father really loves him.



• The father's job is to move his son from self-centeredness to self-discipline. And when that happens, that father has given his son the gift of freedom. When a father gives up his power by giving his son everything he wants, his son will not fear hm in a healthy way. When there is no fear on a son's part of a father's discipline, then that son has lost his freedom



• The last thing your son needs is the pressure to be some great success out there in the world. What he needs is to know that God has created him for a purpose, and if he follows the Lord with his whole heart, he will discover that purpose.


• The single greatest struggle for your son today will be in the area of sexual sin: Talk to him early and wisely; Talk to him honestly; Talk to him often


• Authority provides structure in which lines are clear, problems are faced, consequences are fair and swift, and conflict is resolved. Authoritarianism promotes an environment of tyranny that crushes the spirit and leaves conflict unresolved. A house led by authority is not child centered. It is God centered and parent/ principle driven.


• Give your son a chance to learn to make his own way. Let him get out there and make some choices - about where he might go, about how he might spend this time when he is not under your eyes or thumb. And by the way, when he does make mistakes, don't panic. if he is repentant - especially if he s repentant - reward him for that repentance.