PASSPORT TO PURITY

I do not normally like to use particular curriculums or books, exclusively, for any project. I have had a hard time finding pre-packaged materials that fit exactly what I am looking for. Normally, I use a little bit here and a little bit there, to put together what is needed for the moment. It hit us pretty hard, recently, that we were "past due" in the need for having "THE TALK" with our youngest 2 children (age 12, and moving on 13 quickly). We understand and embrace the fact that "THE TALK", about sex, is really to be an ongoing conversation with our children, beginning whenever the particular child is "ready" (this depends on a number of variables). But, there is value to the foundational "talk", when we talk about the details of sex, and challenge them to follow God's path of purity.

Last week we finished the foundational talks with all 5 of our children, by doing it with our youngest 2. And in each case, we used materials from the Christian organization, Family Life, entitled: "Passport to Purity." This is one of very few pre-packaged materials that I would recommend to every parent, to be used with every child. It is geared for moms to do with their daughters and dads to do with their sons (1 on 1), sometime in the "pre-teen" years. If the children are already 13, it is time, and probably past time. Whatever materials you use; or if you just develop your own talks, these times with our children have the potential of an incredible impact on our children now and in the future. The issues of purity and sex, before and after marriage, are ones our children will face, beginning in their pre-teen years and last the rest of their lives. The investment of time, money and planning is more than worth it!

To save money, Teresa and I took both of our youngest at the same time; but still worked it out so that we were 1 on 1 for all our talks and much of the "downtime". The materials in Passport to Purity include about 7 hours of CD material, including creative teaching about very sensitive issues (body changes, peer pressure, how babies are made, etc.), discussion time between the parent and child, and projects that illustrate the key points. They pretty much lay everything out for you, and in following it, we were able to concentrate on our children and these very important discussions. There are also optional CD's that we will use in the near future to discuss some other related issues that they don't seem to be facing yet, but will very soon. We will use those on future dates with our children.

They suggest taking a weekend (one evening and another full day) and to go, if possible, to a special place outside the home. This adds to the uniqueness and importance of what we are doing during this time. It is nice because the materials really can fit into any family's budget and schedule. It is very flexible. We did it in the middle of the week (one of the benefits of homeschooling) and at a time when the place we went was practically "empty". If you comment on this blog and ask for more information about our time away, I would be happy to give it to you.

The time together ends with the signing of a "wait to date" contract (which has the pre-teen agree to include the parents in future dating plans), a dinner out, and a special gift. The dinner is designed to include both parents with the son or daughter, even though it was just mom or dad who spent the time discussing the details. The gift can be anything that would be a special reminder about the commitment to purity that the young person is making, and the support of the parents in that commitment. We have given a "purity ring" to all 3 of our daughters, and a sword to both our sons.

We understand that this was just the beginning of talks we hope to have with our children about sex and purity in the coming years. But, it was a good, important beginning; and we are so grateful for the resource God provided us to have this special and memorable time with our children!