Lesson 11 was about learning to repeat; and this idea of repenting is certainly something I have had to repeat, and repeat, and repeat again. At first sound, the word repent sounds like something that should be reserved for those terrible sinners who need to repent before they spend eternity in Hell. It has the ring of a street preacher who is yelling the word incessantly. It has the image of a sidewalk protester who is holding a sign using the word repent connected to something they disagree with; and God might as well. But the idea of repentance, the biblical idea, is stronger and broader in its application that Christians have traditionally viewed it.
Repentance is about change. It is a change of mind. It is a change of direction. It is different than confession. To confess means to "say the same thing". In biblical context, when we confess our sins, we are saying that we agree with how God views our actions, our words, our thoughts - that they are against Him, in violation of His Word. We might even list the specific sins, but it is in the agreement we have about those sins that there is true confession. There is a difference between a child, for example, who agrees at a parents insistence that she did not tell the truth, and actually saying the same thing about her lying that God does - agreeing with God about it.
Repentance takes this a crucial step further. Repentance focuses on a 180 degree turn. If you were going in the direction of lying, you know turn the opposite direction and start telling the truth, even becoming known as a truth teller. Repentance is not just a one time confessing of sin, but the beginning of living in opposition to that sin - a real heart and life change. This is only something God's Spirit can do; but it also includes our willingness to be changed, to live differently. We think about it differently, and pursue a very different path as it relates to that particular thing.
Repentance is for non-believers as they first come to Christ and their lives are forever changed. But repentance is also for believers, as we continue to struggle with sin, our old nature, and need to constantly turn from it. Repentance is for pastors, who are real people, real followers of Jesus, and need real, continual repentance. This took me a long time to realize and to put into action in my life. I thought repentance would bring criticism and disappointment from others, and bring shame to God. I thought repentance would take me out of ministry, especially if I was repenting about something that people didn't think pastors should struggle with.
I have learned to repent. And in doing so, there are some key aspects that have helped me in the continual process of repentance:
- It is about pleasing God not impressing others
- True repentance brings God's blessing, despite the consequences from others
- Modeling true repentance is one of the most important things you can do for your children and the people of the church you serve
- The more secret, the more scandalized, the more sensitive the sin, the more important it is to bring it out into the light and turn from it
- I must die to myself daily; and often that will require for me to turn from sin - for the long haul - to live differently. The process will not end until I see Jesus.
- It is not about shame, but about bringing glory to God, and boasting in the cross of Jesus!
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