MORE SLEEP AND MORE HUMILITY

I hate being sick. I absolutely hate it. But, when I am, I seem to learn more humility; even if I don't want to. For the most part, I don't get sick. Normally, I get sick about once a year. That is, the kind of sick where I am "put down" for a week or so; where I spend a lot of time in the bathroom, somtimes throwing up - that kind of sick. I will struggle at times with a cold, but nothing that stops me from working and doing all I need to do.

So, it really bothers me when the common cold puts me down. And, in my opinion, the timing couldn't have been worse. I started getting my cold Thursday night. Friday morning I knew I would just be at home trying to rest, as it is my normal day off. Mainly, it was getting me in the head: sore throat was starting, congestion, headaches, etc.; and I was exhausted. Saturday is usually a flexible day for me, but it ended up being a full work day, with counseling and visiting appointments that I didn't feel I could cancel. Yes, it was my fault, but I felt I had to. Speaking with people and counseling just takes the energy out of me, even when I am healthy.

So, I was hoping, somehow, I would wake up this morning, and everyting would be "out"; and allow me to enjoy my birthday, sing on the worship team, life group (at night) and preach (my favorite thing to do). But, I could tell right away that I wasn't "cleared out" yet and I was going to be struggling wih it.

I had been drinking water all weekend, taking herbs, cold medicine, eating oranges and soup (didn't feel like eating much else). Normally, and especially on Sunday mornings, I am on top of everything, getting things ready for the service and writing notes on what else has to happen that day. Today, however, I felt like I was in a daze, or trudging through mud. I felt like I could hardly move. I also couldn't remember what I had just done or what I was supposed to be doing. It was very frustrating.

I decided not to sing on worship team to save my voice, and I really missed doing that. I had to basically stay away from people, so as to not get them sick, or wear my voice out. And I really do enjoy seeing everyone and talking to many on Sunday mornings. There were also many details to this service, as we were using some videos and had planned a creative drama as a part of the message. I had a hard time keeping all the details straight. That is humbling.

Today's message was about politics, as took a week off of my message series in Mark. I planned on sitting on a stool and having more of a "conversation" in dealing with a very highly emotional issue. That helped me feel more comfortable, but it was frustrating having to blow my nose often and feeling very stuffed up as I spoke. Plus, this was a message I had taken a lot of time and effort, praying over and wanting to be communicated just right. Turns out, I was communicating it through a stuffed up nose, scratchy throat and somewhat clouded mind.

All of this to say, that I was humbled. I want to be able to work hard, do everything I have committed to do, and to do it well. I want to be able to be with and enjoy people. And I want to communicate God's truth as clearly as possible. But, when sick, like today, I am not ablt to do it. This reminds me about a couple truths about God: He is able to accomplish His will without me; and He chooses to use me even when I am weak. And that is the encouraging thing I do hang on to. If I am sick and cannot do what I woudl like, I know God is not surprised, and is, in fact doing what He knows will help me to grow and bring Him the most glory.

So, in taking liberty with the Apostle Paul's words, I can say: "I will therefore glory in my runny nose, headache, discomfort, scratchy throat and fatigue - because when I am weak, He is strong."

Hopefully, I will have learned what I need to learn from this, so I can smell again - that would be nice.