Friday, December 30, 2011

Only 360 shoppingdays till Christmas!

give or take a couple days...
I don't want to start thinking about next Christmas. I want to reflect a little longer on this past one. I love Christmas time. Although our worship of Christ ought to be year around, there are some special family times that are specially memorable because of the holiday. I know things will change as our children get older; but for now, I really enjoy the special days of the Christmas season with our family.

Every family has their own traditions on Christmas, and I really love ours:
Christmas Eve: We normally give one gift, either to the entire family or each individual. It is usually similar, such as PJ's or devotional books, etc. This year, we didn't do it because we had invested more money in our Thanksgiving vacation. We would also, normally, go to a Christmas Eve service; but with Christmas falling on Sunday, we did not have one. However, the other traditions remained. We ate ponzerat (not sure how to spell it, but this is how I pronounce it), which is fried dough with cheese in it. Teresa does a great job in making them, and they are a family favorite on Christmas Eve! Then, we watch the movie: "It's a Wonderful Life". It used to be that we would all sleep by the Christmas tree, but now we sleep on the couches and carpeted floors of the basement. Well, we older ones tend to make our way into our own beds at some point (some sooner than others!). Once everyone is in bed, Teresa and I stuff every one's stockings, that are hanging by the fireplace.

Christmas Day: With our old age, we put a 7 a.m. time on the earliest that the younger ones are allowed to get up and get everyone else up! So, at 7, we hear the footsteps and everyone starts getting everyone else up. Once we are all gathered, we go to get our stockings and bring them back to the living room (by the tree). Everyone opens the stockings at the same time (well, Teresa and I usually wait until the kids are done); and it is a fun way to begin Christmas morning. Teresa talks about growing up and getting fruit and/or nuts in her stocking. How things have changed! Although presents will be delayed for several hours, it always us to enjoy watching the kids receive some smaller, needed, and fun things.

Next, everyone gets dressed and we have breakfast, which includes Teresa making cinnamon rolls (mmm, mmm, good!). This year, with Christmas falling on a Sunday, we had our family worship time before breakfast. This year, a few weeks leading up to Christmas, we used the "Adornments", with are cardboard ornaments, representing parts of the Christmas story, from Family Life (A Christian organization with many great resources). We read Scripture, and a description of part of the story. Then, one of the kids would put an ornament on. There were 12 in all. We closed our worship time with all of us praying and singing praise to God for His wonderful gift!

It was a blessing, then, for our family to go to church together and worship Jesus on His birthday with the rest of our church family! Even though many were gone traveling or celebrating elsewhere, it was wonderful to be with others and worship God on that special morning. Mostly, we read Scripture and sang Christmas carols. It was great!

Now it was time to open the gifts. We have the younger ones hand out the gifts to every one's personal "spot". Once all the gifts are handed out, we go one by one, youngest to oldest, opening one gift per cycle. The rule is that we all watch the person who is opening the gift rather than thinking about our own. One of my favorite parts is watching our kids get up from their spot and with a thank you, go hug the person who just gave them the gift!

After that, it is usually a relaxed day, with kids playing with their gifts, eating food and just enjoying one another. On this particular day, we also invited someone from the church to come over and enjoy Christmas dinner with us. That was a special blessing as well.

Thank you God for these special times at Christmas, with family; and for these memories that will last a lifetime!

Friday, December 23, 2011

Goodbye 1st decade, hello 2nd

When I say it that way, it seems more discouraging than saying it this way: Happy 11th birthday Caleb and Gabrielle! Our youngest 2 turned 11 yesterday; and yes, began their second decade of life. As all parents know, it seems to go so fast...very, very fast! Sometimes, things seem like a blur, and it is hard to "slow things down" and just enjoy the moments, the fleeting moments of their lives, our lives.

Yesterday, I had one of those moments, where things seemed to "stand still" and I just took it all in. I normally take the birthday boy or girl; or boy and girl (with 2 sets of twins, this is normally what happens!) out for donuts on their birthday. And yes, since I am with them, I might as well have a couple myself. I wouldn't want to be a "party pooper" and not celebrate with my kids, right?!

Anyway, on this occasion, I offered to take them out for lunch instead. But, that would have meant them opening their presents a few hours later than planned, and that was no good (not at their age anyway). So, we decided to keep the breakfast appointment, but they did ask to go to Panera Bread instead this year. Don't worry: they still had unhealthy treats in the form of cinnamon crunch bagels and cinnamon rolls!

But, the moment that stood still for me and that I will will hold onto is when, at 6:30 in the morning, I heard them talking in the room (it was cute that they wanted to sleep in the bunk beds in Caleb's room that night). They stood up and looked so big to me. They were all excited for their special day. They had huge smiles on their faces as they thought about going out to breakfast, opening their gifts and then having friends over later to celebrate.

I know there are more important things in life; and I think they do as well. But, for that moment, to take in their pure joy and excitement that came with the beginning of their 2nd decade of life, it was priceless. I will hang onto that memory forever (well, at least until I forget it; and since I'm in my 5th decade of life, the memory might fade well before "forever"!). So, at least for today I will remember their big smiles and excited faces, as I thank God for these 2 precious children!!

p.s. It was an interesting time, after 7:22 a.m. (when Caleb was born), that Gabrielle realized Caleb had just turned 11 but that she was still 10 for another half an hour!

Friday, December 16, 2011

IN THE CLEAR

Last week I wrote about the "dark room" experience that periodically comes in my life; and most can relate to what that is like. This week, God has settled my heart on something quite the opposite of the dark room. I don't know that I would call it the light room; but certainly the idea of sunshine, brightness, and being "in the clear" is how I might describe it. I not only recently experienced a dark room feeling but also this feeling of being "in the clear". And as frustrating and challenging as the dark room can be, the "in the clear" moments are equally encouraging, refreshing and full of hope.

In its most basic form, living in the clear is living the right way, even if others think you are not. For example, if a man is on trial for robbing an elderly person, living "in the clear" has nothing to do with what the accuser, lawyers, judge or jury might say. Even if they convict him, the man accused can still live "in the clear" if he knows he didn't do it; or if he confesses that he did it and then pays the consequence. Being "in the clear" is knowing the truth regardless of circumstance or how others view it.

I think what this really is, is simply living with a good conscience. The Bible talks about the importance of having a good conscience: being clear of any unconfessed sin, living a transparent, honest, albeit imperfect life. The opposite of that is having a seared conscience, where we just live the way we want, and we are no longer sensitive to our own sin. We don't care. We are no longer listening to God and His Word.

Probably the situations where I realize my feeling of living "in the clear", is when I am confronted with the possibility, not only of sin (I do that all the time); but that I have unconfessed sin, of which I am unwilling to repent of. That is serious business! None of us like to offend or sin against others, but we know it is a regular part of life. Just ask those who live with you! But, the key is this: when we offend and sin against others (which happens all the time), we also need to be confessing our sin and making things right.

There are times, however, when the person who is hurt or offended does not accept or believe you. And there are times, when you cannot just make things right - at least not very easily. In fact, there are times, when there is nothing you can do. It is at those times, when regardless of what others are saying, you and I have the opportunity to live "in the clear".

For me, personally, it looks like this: That I know I don't have anything I am hiding. I have confessed my sins, made things right with others; and have remained open to how I need to learn and grow. When you have this confidence, of living the best way you know how, you are living "in the clear." That is an incredible experience and feeling. There is nothing like it. The circumstances, actually, don't have to be any different than when you were in the "dark room."

But, the real difference is how you choose to approach it, look at it, and live in it. So, to all of you who happen to read this particular blog entry, here is hoping that today, you are living "in the clear."

Saturday, December 10, 2011

The Dark Room

Have you ever been in the "dark room". It has nothing to do with photography. I am speaking more metaphorical than physical, but nonetheless, it is dark. Some might describe it as depression, but even those who don't label it as depression, might still relate to my description of the "dark room."

I find myself there, almost with no warning; and even if moments earlier, I was in a room full of light. And I'm not sure if I entered a different room, or, and I am thinking this is the case, the dark room I find myself in was in fact the same room full of light just moments before. I don't necessarily have a physical response to the darkness, or an immense fear of any kind (except the fear that the darkness might not go away).

I say there is no physical response, but once I recognize I am in the dark room, I do feel differently. Everything seems different. I don't feel like doing anything. I am ultra-sensitive; and this is normally revealed in my sensitivity, not to light or temperature, but to others actions or attitudes, including words that others say. I find myself responding in the dark room, in ways that I normally would respond, when functioning in the light.

When I try to look for a way out of the room or a way to turn on some lights in the room, it is very frustrating. I can't find an easy way out and there seems to be no electricity or windows. I know the light sources are there (at least I think they are) because I just had light seconds ago. But, somehow, now in this dark room, there seems to be no way to get the light in quickly (or even at all).

What adds to the frustration is trying to figure out why I am in the dark room and why, with all of my efforts, even ones that have worked before, my environment is not changing. I also recognize that the longer I am in the dark room, without any light, the worse I feel, the the thinking patterns; and the worse the actions I feel capable of at any moment.

WHAT IS GOING ON?

Not sure if I am the only one who has even found himself in this dark room; but I doubt it. And I am not here to give any easy answers, because I found those "easy" answers are not always easy; and don't always "work", at least not my time frame. But, having spent probably about 8 straight hours in the dark room recently, I now look back on it, and have tried to learn some things from it. Maybe (or maybe not), the same things I am learning might encourage you:

1. It is important to recognize, as soon as possible, that I am in the dark room. In fact, if possible, it is best to realize I am heading into the dark room before I ever take the first step within it.

2. Being in the dark room could go exactly what God intended; or it could be my own sinful decisions that have brought me there. Eventually, evaluating why I am there or how I got there can be helpful in dealing with the consequences of being in the room; or even preventative to future visits .

3. Being in the dark room doesn't change the truths about God, about me, and about my relationship with God. The sooner I recognize it and admit it, the sooner I can apply those truths to my dark room experience.

Romans 15:13 - "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."

Friday, December 2, 2011

I MISS THE BEACH

That is a phrase people that know me would never expect to hear coming out of my mouth. In fact, this is probably the first time I have ever said it (or written it). Normally, I agree with my father-in-law who recently said: "I like everything about the beach except for the sun, the sand and the water!" Now, he was kidding; but I'm not. I can't think of something much more uncomfortable than being out in the hot sun, getting burned and having hot sand in between my toes. My wife, on the other hand, LOVES the beach. That's the only thing we disagree on of course!

However, the title of this blog is correct: I miss the beach. It doesn't mean I wish I was still on vacation or that my opinions on the above discomfort has changed. It has everything to do with the days I recently spent on the beach...alone with God. He used that time to re-energize me, to refresh me, and to get my perspective back on the right track. I'm sure it is this way in other professions; but as a pastor, I know I need some time to get away, periodically, and refocus. That is why I miss the beach.

Every morning, on vacation, before anyone else arose, I had time to walk on the beach (note:going to the beach early in the morning cuts down on the some of its inherent discomfort!), and just be with God. I was able to pray for long periods of time and meditate on Scripture. Whether on vacation or not, I know I need some time to talk with God and let Him talk to me. But, when away in a different environment (even a beach), there seems to be a special opportunity to return to a better perspective on life and ministry. That is what happened for me.

I will close with the 4 verses that God used from Romans 12 (the passage of Scripture our family just memorized) to remind me of my responsibility. I meditated on this passage all through vacation and from that, I know what God was trying to say to me:

Romans 12:9-12 - "Love must be sincere: hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope,patient in affliction, faithful in prayer."