Matthew Henry and Thanksgiving

In preparation for Thanksgiving, our family has been reading from the booklet: Growing Together in gratitude: Stories of Faith for Families - by Barbara Rainey

I want to take an excerpt from one of the readings, because it was so encouraging to me. It is in the context of a reading about "Finding the Good in the Bad":

"Matthew Henry was a Puritan preacher in the late 1600's. Like our friend Amy,he once wrote in his diary about something bad that happened to him. One day, while walking home in London, he was robbed by a couple of men who jumped him from the shadows of an alley. Being robbed is hardly an everyday nuisance - it's much more unsettling, more of a personal violation that can leave one feeling vulnerable and frightened. Reverend Henry probably felt those things, but what he wrote that night is very instructive: 'Let me be thankful, first, because I was never robbed before; second, because although they took my purse, they did not take my life; third, because although they took my all, it was not much; and fourth, because it was I who was robbed and not I who robbed.'

What a great perspective on a difficult situation! Matthew Henry chose to look for the good that was hidden in the bad. And by doing this he showed us how important it is to focus on the positive that God wants us to see in every situation in life. It's always there; we just have to choose to look for it."

Chick-fil-A

I do love Chick-fil-a. When I lived in Florida, I became a sweet tea lover; and up here in the frigid North, it seems the only place the tea is this sweet is Chick-fil-a. Yes, their chicken is awesome as well. I like Tim Hawkins and I love Chick-fil-a. So, this is one of my favorite songs!

POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE: Your Choice!

This is something I have been thinking about quite a bit lately. There is something in common with all of the experiences we have each day. Some of them would be labeled as positive and some negative; and much of that depends on who is looking at the situation. For example, this past Sunday, our Cleveland Browns lost to the New York Jets. From a fan and team's perspective, the Browns and their fans see the result as negative (unless you are one of those non-fans who want to lose to get better draft picks!); and the Jets and their fans see the result as positive. That makes sense, right? And there are many things in life, just like that, where depending on what end of the circumstance you are on, you may see it as positive or negative.

However, I do believe, that even though it is a part of life, to have positive or negative experiences, that we do have a choice. That is, regardless of our circumstances, we can choose a positive outlook. Really? How is that? Let me explain. One of the foundational issues, in order to have a positive outlook, is the issue of eternal salvation. One thing that is a must, in order to see all of life, and death, as positive, is to be a follower of Jesus Christ. If you are a follower of Christ, not just professing belief, but actually following (James 1:22),then you absolutely have the opportunity to see all things positively.

Let's take the football game, for example. The Jets and their fans are going to see the win as positive (except in the cases where they want draft picks or want to lose so their coach can be fired. That is for bad teams and for fans that in my opinion, are not true fans). But, how can Browns fans or Christian players see it as positive? There are several ways:

• Since we believe in God's sovereignty, then we believe that whatever God allows (even if we don't like it), is what will bring Him the most glory
• Since we believe in the Bible, including Romans 8:28, then we believe that whatever God allows (even if it is painful or considered by us to be bad) is for our spiritual good.
• If a player gets traded or released or a coach fired over a loss, or multiple losses, then God's sovereignty still stands; and God may have a different plan for the Christians involved than they first thought.
• There is a great opportunity for we, as fans, to remember that this is just football; and although it has temporary pleasure, it certainly should not affect our emotions as it relates to living real life with our God, family and others. If our team losing a game puts us in depression, then it means that we are not following Jesus as we should. We have our priorities mixed up. One good thing about situations like this is that it tests what is really important to us, and checks our motives.

Perhaps you might say: that is all fine and good with something as trivial as football; but what about the major issues of life. Like what? You might say: what about cancer or a car accident or a job loss, etc. Yes, those are major issues, and much more important than football (yes, fanatic football fans who aren't quite sure - I can prove it by Scripture!).

Well, believe it or not, the response, as followers of Jesus, that we need to have in light of these tragedies and very painful times that affect so many, is the same response we have to football and other temporary, insignificant things. You do have a choice, as to how you look at something. Don't get me wrong: it is o.k. to be sorrowful, when you find out that you or someone you love has cancer. It is o.k. to cry and hurt like crazy when you or someone you love loses their job and go through a financial crisis. And it is o.k. to be concerned and frustrated with a car accident, especially if someone was hurt. But, you have a choice to make: will I focus on the negative aspects of this circumstance (and humanly speaking there may be many); or am I going to focus on the positive? If there is a tragedy, let's say cancer, the positive outlook is from God:

• This did not surprise God. Nothing happens outside of His allowance and control; so I will trust, positively, that God knows what He is doing and I am "safe" in Him.
• If God chooses to take my life "early" (from a human point of view),then I will be with Him in Heaven, with no more pain. I will be reunited with loved ones who have gone on before.
• I will choose to see this an opportunity for God to show who He is through this. He will have to provide financially. He will have to provide the encouragement, strength and wisdom needed. He may choose, as everyone is praying, to heal me;and all glory goes to Him. He may give me opportunities to witness of Jesus, which might only come because of this physical ailment. I will focus on God instead of my cancer.
• I have much to be thankful for; and with the days I have left on this earth, I will not take them for granted any longer; but with joy, appreciate everything I have - every breath I have left.

That is just an example. Most of the circumstances of every day life are not so dramatic, but I do believe that they offer us a choice. Unfortunately, I have found that Christians also struggle with their attitude and the way they approach "unfortunate" circumstances. But, as followers of Jesus, we have the great opportunity to live with an eternal perspective . (II Corinthians 4:16-18). We can choose to see things positively, no mater what they are; and as we do, we glorify God, and draw others to Him!

II Corinthians 4:16-18 - "So we do not lose heart. Though our outer nature is wasting away, our inner nature is being renewed day by day. For this slight momentary affliction is preparing fr us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. for the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal."

Church and Oil Changes

On my way to work from my oil change this morning, it hit me: I can learn something about church ministry from my oil change experience. I want the church worship experience to be a good one for everyone that comes, and my oil change experience was not a good one. The specific name of the place I went will remain anonymous (unless you want to know so that you never take your car there!):

• when I arrived for my 7 a.m. appointment, the doors were locked. No one showed up to let me in until 7:05 a.m. Not good! I waited and didn't lambaste them for their rudeness; but none the less, it wasn't good. If we say we have a service or program here at church, the appropriate doors need to be unlocked, with signage and/or people there to help. We need to be "open for business" when we say we are. In fact, we should be "open" and ready for people well before the appointed time listed.
• There was no apology. I didn't let this deter me from staying, but I would think good customer service would include a sincere apology when there is a situation like this. As a church, I would hope that if a door is locked, or there was not good signage, or no help for someone finding a room, or we were not prepared when someone came to a class or service - that we would sincerely apologize for our mistake and do what we can to demonstrate that we are so glad they are there!
• I heard excuses for why it took almost 20 minutes for my car to get into the garage to be looked at when I was the only customer for the first 10 minutes. Instead of giving an explanation and asking for patience, with apology, the guy up front made excuses without any concern for his customers. As a church, one of the most important things we can do is communicate with our guests. And if something does not go right and causes some discomfort for our guests, we ought to apologize and explain what we are doing to correct the issue.
• While I was waiting (and working - at least I brought my laptop with me to be productive!), the guy who works up front was on the phone with a couple personal phone calls. In one case, he was swearing on the phone and threatening to go over to this guy's house and slap him around! I assume this is a friend or family member, but it didn't sound good to the customers who were waiting for service. Here at church, it is so important that we are aware of our guests, those we are trying to serve. Yelling or swearing at others, even our own family members, has no place at anytime, but especially in public, when it adversely affects others. No matter the relationship, we need to be kind and loving; and if a tough conversation has to take place, it should not take place publicly, at church!
• My appointment was at 7 a.m. and I walked out and got in my car at 8:17 a.m. (almost 1 hour and 20 minutes later!) Again, no apology for how long it took; and in fact, my car was parked at different location where I could not see it, wasn't told where it was, and I had to find it on my own. Those who come to church should be able to expect consistency from us. If we say that a service or meeting or program lasts a certain amount of time, we should do our best to be done at that time, or apologize for not being done. It is all about valuing people and one of their most valuable resources: their time!
• I came in with a coupon for a $16.99 oil change and then paid a bill at the end (adding nothing on to the oil change) for $25.53. The explanation given was that this was for an extra quart of oil and for taxes. There was no explanation prior, on the coupon or given before the work was done. I expected a few dollars in tax, perhaps, but not to pay almost $9 more than what the coupon promised. Again, it is about expectations and communication for the church. And beside time, other people certainly count money as one of their most valuable resources (if not their most). We do not charge for our services here. In fact, it is only our committed attenders and members that we ask to give to God through our offering: voluntarily, joyfully and sacrificially (all biblical principles). It is our desire, not to take as much money as we can from someone (even somewhat deceptively); but instead, to encourage people to experience God's blessing by giving back some of what God has given them to Him as a part of their worship.

In summary, I hope my experience at the oil change will make me: more sensitive to others; go beyond their expectations; and through communication and care, demonstrate true love to others I come into contact with!

Mercy Me!

I didn' realize it until after it was all over. I had demonstrated mercy. I kind of wish I knew I was doing it, because then it would have been more intentional, it seems, more godly. The event, however, did keep me thinking about this issue of mercy the rest of the week and now through the weekend. What is mercy? In its most simplistic form, mercy is withholding judgment, discipline, punishment, even though it would be "just" and the person is deserving of the judgment. However, the one who holds the authority,and has the power to decide, makes the decision not to hand out the fine, the punishment, the "justice". That is mercy.

Those of us who are followers of Jesus Christ have received the greatest example of mercy there is:
"Ephesians 2:4,5 - "But God, being rich in mercy, becuse of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our sins, made us alive together with Christ -by grace you have been saved."

This is mercy (not receiving what we do deserve - everlasting punishment and separation from God) and grace (receiving what we don't deserve - eternal life with God forever) working together. It is amazing.

And we are instructed, that since we have received this kind of forgiveness, this mercy, that we are, in turn, to show mercy to one another. All of us, regardless of our age or situation in life, have mercy moments, where we are in the position of giving or withholding mercy. Now, there are times when God calls us to discipline and hand out "justice". Certainly, He does the same. But, there are also times, many times, when mercy is the right call, and we have the choice to make.

Parents hold their tender children in their hands, and there are times when they feel like "crushing them". They are bigger, stronger (for now) and have all the authority and power. They could treat them harshly, without mercy, and justify it easily. We as parents have daily opportunitites to demonstrate mercy.

Some of us have that opportunity in other organizations or at work. There are people who answer to us, or "owe" us in some way, and we are put in the position to "hurt" them, to "make them pay", etc. It is a mercy moment.

For me, I realize that as a husband, father and pastor, I have many mercy moments. I wish I could say that I was always merciful; but I certainly fall short, quite often I'm afraid. It is nice, once in a while, to look back and see how God did show mercy through me, even though I fail often. This past week, I could have "crushed" that person by telling him/her what I really thought about what they did. I decided not to. In fact, if you were to ask that person if I was merciful, he/she probably would say it didn't apply. He/she didn't even realize mercy was being offered. That's probably the best way for it to go. I show mercy, but get no credit for it. That is a good thing. If we show mercy in order to look good to others, we might be merciful but we are also proud; and we have our reward - the temporal admiration of others. We need to be merciful because God is merciful to us, and He asks of His followers, that we do the same. That brings blessing that only God can bring; and the rewards become eternal!

Doctor of Poopology?

I do have an earned Doctorate, but no one really asks me questions that have to do with that area in which I have studied and practiced for years. But, yesterday, I came to the realization that although I have no desire to study this particular area, I might as well get my degree in poopology; since that is where I am being asked the questions. If you have read my blog recently, then you know we had a new addition to our family a couple of weeks ago: Nikki. She is a couple of months old, and is a Yorkshire/Doxen mix. I am told that makes her a Dorkey (doesn't seem too complimentary).

Anyway, our kids have a day (their day) when they have certain responsibilities; which now also includes taking the dog out to do her "duty". However, I get the early morning and late night take out, since we certainly don't want to disturb the beauty sleep of all our beautiful children (I guess that is the reasoning). Anyway, yesterday, I realized what I am good for, as the husband and father of the household.

From upstairs, in the middle of the afternoon, I hear "Daddy, we need you". Now, that can be a very nice thing, an encouraging phrase to hear; but not so in this case. It was explained to me that I needed to take the dog outside to go #2 (if you don't know what that means, ask your young child). Why did I need to do that, I inquired? "Because she won't go #2 for us and you know how to get her to do that!" Naively, I actually took that as a compliment, and a challenge, and took our young pup out to do her thing...which she did.

When I triumphantly returned indoors, I was asked, as though I am the expert, as to how I did it. Again, ignorantly, I shared my "expertise" with the family. It didn't take me too long to realize what I had done. I, inadvertently, had become the #2 expert, and might as well have my doctorate in it. I am the one, now, that will be called on, to get the reluctant dog to do her thing. Great! Why didn't I learn, like many dads, that you are supposed to pretend you don't know how to do something, or do it very poorly, so that you will never be asked to do it again? I'm a slow learner I guess.

I would write some more, but I thing I hear my name being called.
Hand me the plastic bag.